People have asked me if I use notebooks to write my thoughts down. A lot of writers do, but I have to say that I am not one of them. The reason for this is simple. Fear. The times I get stuck the most are the places in between my thoughts. I know that doesn't make sense. I will try my best to explain. My stories come to me in pieces, almost like little movies. A lot of times it's from listening to a certain song that will inspire a vision, almost like my own personal music video. So I have all these little movies in my head and need to somehow put them all together to make a story. If I were to write down each vision as it's own piece then I fear that I won't be able to connect them. So, I hold them inside my head and tell the story from the start and hope that it will help allow the story to flow out of me better.
I do have to say that there was one time I did write a scene down, and that was again, because of fear. It had come to me very early in the writing process of Cutting Through. It was taking me a long time to get to the scene, since it was closer to the end. I couldn't take having it rattle in my head any longer, so I wrote it down. I feared that if I didn't get it out and on paper that it would eat me alive. It was the scene where Janie and Kyle meet up at the bar and the incident in the parking lot. That was an intense scene for me to write, so I felt if I didn't get it out of me soon, I would go crazy.
Not every one is going to understand how my brain works. Most of the time I don't. Some may think that what I just said sounds absolutely nuts, and maybe it is. But I don't care. I never asked for my brain to work this way, but I'm glad it does. I love telling stories, and my hope is that people will enjoy reading them just as much.